menstrual marinade

thanksgiving fuckin rocked. I started drinking champagne around 10a and managed to pass out twice before dinner. we watched the tom cruise end of the world movie and it was kinda okay until the robot spaceship things started coming up out of the ground and then it really started to blow. so I guess thats pretty much the whole movie. the worst of it was at the end when his emotionally retarded kids survived and I wanted to stab myself in the goddamn face but I just ate pie instead. plus I had to watch football and I think people were getting irritated with me cos I kept talking about how fat they all were. I hate having holidays at other peoples houses when I can't tell them to change the fucking channel or hole up in my room for bonghits. sharing is gay.

shit thats fucked

thursday before last tapeworm picked me up from school and drove into the taco time parking lot and I was like YAY! tacos! and when I got out of the car 2 men jumped out of the sidedoor of the van parked next to us and pulled me into the van with them.

I could see tapeworm talking to a woman and he got back in the car and drove away without a second look. the woman sat in the drivers seat and said they were taking me to my new home and I wouldn't be going back to my school and I was blindfolded so that I wouldn't be able to tell anyone where I was staying.

I spent 2 weeks scrubbing the floors of a 3 story house with a toothbrush. eating only every other day and forced to listen to hip hop radio.

this morning they came in my room early and told me to get dressed and bring my things outside and get in the van to go to school. I went to class with a suitcase of clothes and didn't talk to anyone. tapeworm picked me up after school like nothing had ever happened and I'm still not really sure what went down.




I opened up a cafepress store featuring art from my other blog.

its one stop shopping for the whole family. get your christmas orders in now!

"have you seen my baseball?"

britt is functionally obsolescent. today I baked a pie and got in a fight with a mexican girl at school.

some guy left me a voicemail about part time positions and money for school and I was like, hmm..I don't remember sending out any resumes but I wrote his number down anyhow and tapeworm said "so you thinking of joining the army?" and I was like huh? no not really and he said "whats this number for?" and I said "I dunno..someone called about part time work" and he was like, "um carrie, thats the army."

and I really thought his name was corporal. I am obviously a genius.

I'm fighting the urge to be petty right now and I can totally see why I don't do this often cos it really fucking sucks.

and this is a newt.