Saturday, June 18, 2005

limburger

I was in the student lounge before an exam and this girl named Sarah that always sits behind me walked up and was like, "do you have a minute to help me?" and I was like, "sure" because I'm a fucking nerd and I get off on the fact that people seek my help.

She sat down and I almost gagged because she smelled so fucking rank, like lutefisk and 3 day old armpit. I was actually trying to hold my breath and talk and I would turn my head to take another breath.

Anyhow, I was trying to explain the shit to her as quickly as I could but she doesn't listen and starts panicking when she doesn't understand. I'm trying to be patient and not be too obvious about the fact that I think she's a retarded werewolf bitch and I can't breathe at all because of the stench permeating from her body.

And then her cell phone rings.

Normally I would just be annoyed that she is wasting my time and doesn't even have the courtesy to step away while she answers her phone, but instead I was thinking, who the hell would want to call you and WHY??

She turned out to be one of those people that think I want to know who/what that call was all about when she gets off the phone and she couldn't be any more wrong, but of course she proceeds to tell me about how that was her sister letting her know that she had the vcr set to record dr.phil for her.

I don't understand why people like that even waste their tuition.

Blogger Sera Strawbridge thinks I am a total genius.

That describes just about 99.9% of all the people at my college.

Btw, your profile pic cracked me up so hard.

Saturday, June 18, 2005 6:18:00 PM  
Blogger The Moviequill thinks I am a total genius.

that wasn't her cellphone ringing..it was her Smellometer going off again (and here she thought there was just a short in the circuits)

Wednesday, June 29, 2005 6:35:00 AM  

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