Thursday, January 05, 2006

I hope god wasn't looking...

the bastard asked for 5 random facts about me.
apparently I interpreted "random" as "twisted".

update: and because fruey of let's have it did not find my mullet to be very rock n roll, he's requested a BONUS RANDOM ROCK N ROLL FACT.

update 2: I changed my mind and I've relieved one lucky blogger of their meming obligations and I'm challenging semi-anonymous commentor jx to pick up the slack (you dont have to link your blog but it'd be cool if you played along in the comments).

1. I got in the backseat of tapeworms car so my best friend could give him a blowjob.

2. I didn't eat rice for like 10 years because I ate some chinese food in my room one time and I put the half eaten plate under my bed and forgot about it for a few weeks and when I found it again all the rice was crawling around on the plate. and I made my mom clean it up.

3. when I was 8 I had a mullet and wore shoes without socks or laces and hypercolor tshirts and fluorescent pink spandex pants like everyday. ugh. I was such an anomaly.

4. I gave my phone number out twice using irc in the school library for the first time. the first caller I could tell was a bit older than myself and polite but whacked off in my ear nonetheless. he called again the next day and after that I told him it was probably best that he not make a habit of it and he agreed to move on.
the second guy was not so easily persuaded. his voice was super nasally and he called several times a day and all he ever wanted to do was talk about my feet and so I'd be like dude, dont call me anymore but he was like "I can tell you have really nice feet and I need to talk to you carrie. please. I love you." and I'd hang up and panic cos I lived with my parents and they woulda killed me if they answered the phone to some creeped out old dude trying to talk to their 14 year old daughter.
I had my friend taya over after school one day and she answered the phone and I knew right away who she was talking to by the sudden change in her voice. I told her to hand me the phone but she ignored me and continued talking. a few seconds later she yelled "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT FOR?!" and I was like oh shit and she said "NO FUCK YOU. CARRIE DOESN'T WEAR PANTIES. WE WEAR UNDERWEAR GODDAMNIT. I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU"
he didn't call anymore after that.

5. me and my friend faye made 2 boys jerk off for meth.

6. tapeworm took me to the paramount to see slayer and I ran into his exgirlfriend having a cigarette in the lobby. she had a ground level wristband and when she found out I was there with him she got all excited about wanting to see him so I let her trade me her wristband :D for my ticket so they could do some catching up and I could try to wedge myself up next to the stage. it totally fucking rocked. some creepy looking guy standing behind me was tying off and I got scared that someone might push him and he'd miss and stab me in the back with his HIV needle so I pushed forward and spent the remainder of the show just far back enough to avoid serious injury. when the show was over I met up with a less than impressed tickles tapeworm outside the front doors. I think he actually smoked a bowl in front of me. like without passing.
in fact, reading this is probably going to piss him off all over again :)

and I'm tagging...
tapeworm, jorell, jx, jennifer
and the FRESHLY IMPREGNATED danielle

thats right!! danielle's knocked up! get over there and send your condolences

Anonymous Thomas, the Retarded Monkey thinks I am a total genius.

Jerking off for meth...

Hell, most guys I know would have done it for free.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 4:48:00 AM  
Blogger Croaker thinks I am a total genius.

Always twistedly entertaining.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 6:29:00 AM  
Blogger jaksplat thinks I am a total genius.

You don't really wear underwear, do you?

Thursday, January 05, 2006 8:36:00 AM  
Anonymous Jx thinks I am a total genius.

im confused, are you and tapeworm together or just living together? if you're together - whats the story behind you letting your bf give him head?

Thursday, January 05, 2006 10:22:00 AM  
Blogger nicole thinks I am a total genius.

Dude, there is no way in HELL that my random facts could ever come close to yours (Bastard tagged me too). That was AWESOME!!!!!

I also get the random "nice feet" comments from total strangers and it flips me out. The number of times some guy has either asked or commented on my feet is frightening. Even more frightening is the fact that I was always wearing close-toed shoes.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 10:36:00 AM  
Anonymous fruey (Let's Have It) thinks I am a total genius.

There's just no digging foot fetishists.

You got the sex and the drugs, but you missed the rock and roll. Any chance of a bonus #6 rock and roll random fact?


Thursday, January 05, 2006 11:56:00 PM  
Blogger Tickles_Tapeworm thinks I am a total genius.

bitch, i did my shit.

Friday, January 06, 2006 5:40:00 AM  
Anonymous fruey (Let's Have It) thinks I am a total genius.

Now you are totally living up to your quoted occupation "fuckin rock star". I'm totally stoked you added that bonus fact. Especially at the risk of getting Tickles pissed at you (but hey, you also admit you let your best friend gave him head).

Oh, and what is it with you yanks and "bowls" and "blunts" all the time? Like, we all roll our own in Europe.


Friday, January 06, 2006 8:05:00 AM  
Blogger Nick thinks I am a total genius.

I;m jerking it just reading that some guy jerked it for meth...

Friday, January 06, 2006 3:41:00 PM  
Blogger captain_howdy_girl thinks I am a total genius.

I had a slight mullet in highschool thought I didn't know it was a mullet at the time

Sunday, January 08, 2006 1:11:00 AM  
Blogger eric thinks I am a total genius.

hypercolor shirts are the shit. why hasn't some idiot tried to bring those back. i'm sure those things had some cancer causing agent in them that no one told us about.

Monday, January 09, 2006 9:07:00 AM  
Anonymous jx thinks I am a total genius.

You want 5 random facts about me? But I didn't get the answer to my question!

Tuesday, January 10, 2006 9:01:00 AM  
Blogger Danielle thinks I am a total genius.

That's awesome! When you were mentioning to me about a new post, I was thinking, "Hey, we should just go to our confessions list and spread the story a little further..." Hmmm.. mind if I try? Thanks for sending ppl over.. that was SWEET! :P love ya carrie:X

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 2:38:00 PM  
Anonymous jx thinks I am a total genius.

im still waiting for an answer....

Thursday, January 12, 2006 4:16:00 AM  
Anonymous The Bastard thinks I am a total genius.

That was great!!!! i knew there was a reason I picked you.

What are you wearing right now? Just kidding!!!

Great facts I laughed my ass off to your friend picking up the phone.

Thursday, January 12, 2006 5:00:00 AM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

thomas- what? jerk off or get high?

croaker- thank you ;)

chef- shhhhh...dont tell taya

jx- both. we've been together for 5 years and living together for 2.
I already gave you the story behind it; I got in the backseat. if you want the details you'll have to ask him :p

nicole- thank you :)
I dont get the whole foot fetish thing. freaks. but with closed toe shoes... thats just scary.

fruey- HAHAHA!! yeah but you guys add tobacco dont you? we're fuckin lazy americans! and bongs are a totally unparalled high.

nick- yeah I was kinda impressed too.

captain- yeah I didnt know the proper terminology either. I was pretty pissed off about that haircut.

eric- ahah!! yeah I always fucking ruined them in the dryer. I'm guessing they lost their appeal when people finally started realizing hot pink armpit rings were not the hotness.

danielle- hmmm...:-? I'll have to look over my list and see what could be elaborated on.

bastard- hehe.. thank you :)

Friday, January 13, 2006 4:13:00 AM  

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