all my cousins totally hate me cos I've been way better than all of them since like, birth. plus I was the youngest and spent my whole first 7 years as a full time narc.
when I was 4 my cousin matt fed me like half a box of dog jerky and told me it was real beef jerky but I knew there was something wrong with it cos he was actually being nice and so I told my grandma and she got extra pissed and made him eat the whole rest of the pack.
when he was in 2nd grade he got lice so bad he plucked out all of his eyelashes. I never met his mom but I'm pretty sure she was a hooker.
he moved in with my aunt and her husband/his dad when he was like 10 but he was pretty much fucked from go and by the time he was 17 they'd finally had enough of him and were like, "get out" and so he and his scumbag friends would break into their house a whole bunch and steal everything and pawn it for heroin and he stole her car a few times and spent a good amount of time in jail.
I'm pretty sure he was gay. well his dad turned out to be anyhow. one time my aunt came home early from work and walked right into some kind of nazi meeting in her basement. he had swastikas hung on 3 walls and everyone was dressed in uniform.
when she filed for divorce, he had his hair dyed blonde cos he thought it was because he was starting to look old.
6 months after he moved out she found some unmarked videotapes and popped one in the vcr where she saw her ex-husband and a couple of his co-workers attempting to make their own amateur gay porn.
..I don't remember where I was going with this.