Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Ever wonder what the H stands for in Jesus H. Christ?

That's right. Jesus Hitler Christ.



Now, most of you probably have never stopped to consider whether or not Jesus and Hitler are one and the same. You probably blindly follow the absurd belief that Jesus was our 'Lord and Savior' and was in no way connected to Hitler, who was an Anti-Semitic imperialistic murdering fuckhead. But I would like you to take a look at the facts before you go on believing this rubbish:

-Jesus and Hitler have never been spotted in the same place.

-Both Jesus and Hitler were carpenters early in their career.

-Both Jesus and Hitler were masters of propaganda.

-Mein Kampf is the sequel to the Bible.

Myth: Jesus was a miracle child, born to a virgin.
Fact: Jesus's mom was a slut and Maury Povich wasn't around to round up the herds of Nomads that she let plow her so she claimed she was a virgin. That bitch.

Myth: Prayers have always ended with the standard amen.
Fact: Prayers were originally concluded with a Heil Jesus! Over time and through translations it was shortened to the now known 'amen'.



NOTE: Before you bombard me with hate mail...I am not the author of this swill, I am simply amused by it. Now that you're informed, bomb away!

Much more fun to be had at Jesus IS Hitler.

Blogger Critical Darling thinks I am a total genius.

I usually don't go in for all that mindless hero-worship shite, but my god...you fucking rule.

Thursday, February 10, 2005 1:29:00 AM  
Blogger Funky Fresh Freddie thinks I am a total genius.

NICE! I LIKE!

GIVE ME MORE!

Thursday, February 10, 2005 2:00:00 AM  
Blogger anonymousthinker thinks I am a total genius.

Your post was quite odd I must say.. I have never in my life heard someone compare Jesus to Hitler...Just because someone has the same job as someone else or has never been in the same place as the other does not make them connected. The bible does not have a sequal as it clearly says in the bible that nothin can be added or taken away from this book. I do not see your logic in provin that marry wasn't a virgin.. or shall i say the author of this absurdness.. Jesus was loving and just... Hitler was not.. Jesus rose from the dead.. Hitler did not.. Jesus healed people.. Hitler did not.. Jesus walked on water.. Hitler did not.. Jesus seperated the red sea.. Hitler did not.. the list goes on.. They are deffinately NOT the same...

Thursday, February 10, 2005 5:15:00 PM  
Blogger Tickles_Tapeworm thinks I am a total genius.

anonymousthinker- You didn't follow the link at the bottom of this post, did you?

The Bible, Part II

Thursday, February 10, 2005 5:41:00 PM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

Jesus Hitler Christ!

You are "deffinately NOT" getting it.

And you're right.
The Bible doesn't have a sequal.
It's a sequel.
Not an addition, but rather a continuation by definition of the word.

If you look at the title page of Mein Kampf, you will clearly see that it reads, "Mein Kampf: Holy Bible II".

Do yourself a favor--go back and click the link, mmmkay?

Thursday, February 10, 2005 6:17:00 PM  
Blogger Euian thinks I am a total genius.

The easiest connection I could find between Hitler and Jesus is that Hitler uses the symbol swastika. The symbol has been around centuries before Jesus and it means messiah in occult symbolism, it also means key. I think the reason Hitler used the symbol is that because he knows occult teachings and wanted to use the power of the symbol.

Friday, February 11, 2005 2:06:00 AM  
Blogger Euian thinks I am a total genius.

Sorry about the multiple comments, I don't know how'd that happened.

Friday, February 11, 2005 2:10:00 AM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

I took the liberty of deleting one for you :)

You should visit Jesus is Hitler for more undeniable connections.

Friday, February 11, 2005 2:25:00 AM  
Blogger Lumbergh-in-training thinks I am a total genius.

it would help if anonymous thinker thought a little

Jesus seperated the red sea.. Hitler did not.

Didn't Jesus calm the Red Sea centuries after Moses parted it? Sorry I don't know for sure, I am a Hindu.

Jesus rose from the dead.. Hitler did not.. Jesus healed people.. Hitler did not.. Jesus walked on water.. Hitler did not..

well, none of these can be proved. The Bible is what it is - a collection of fables. If animals did talk, Aesop's fables would have been the bible. Had Hitler been born in the old ages, it is possible that we will be living in the Hitler era instead of the Christian era.

XOXOXO

Friday, February 11, 2005 10:27:00 PM  
Blogger Ethereal Darkness thinks I am a total genius.

Jesus loves me... He's in my head. He tells me to....KILL!!

Friday, February 11, 2005 11:14:00 PM  
Blogger Tom Armstrong thinks I am a total genius.

the link is now dead because the hosting company most likely was opposed to the viewpoint portrayed. this is another way that jesus and the neocons can hide their true motives: making us conform to their outrageously restrictive lifestyle.

resist resist.

excellent blog, by the by.

Monday, February 28, 2005 12:52:00 PM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

Damnit. Fucking fascists!

Monday, February 28, 2005 1:13:00 PM  
Blogger Tu-cypher-Cris thinks I am a total genius.

You Know Carrie....I was watching Cinderella Man the other day (great movie) & came across the term, "Jesus H. Christ"!.....I too wondered what the meaning of this saying is. Here is my opinion on the matter.

I think it means-Jesus Hail-Mary Christ.

Monday, June 06, 2005 3:05:00 PM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

Obviously it means Jesus HITLER Christ...sheesh.

But for reals, people just say Jesus H. Christ because they think it's different from saying "the Lord's name in vain".
I think it means what ever the fuck you want it to mean, like Hiram or Herschel or some shit (remember, he was Jewish, yo).

Monday, June 20, 2005 12:41:00 AM  

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