Monday, October 17, 2005

beware.. the enemy is lurking

danielle picked me some cotton! from a cotton field. it doesn't grow on trees it comes from bushes. but everyone knows that already because otherwise it wouldn't make sense for the living to be easy when the cotton is high.

I've never seen a cotton field or a cotton bush or anything and I keep expecting some weird little alabama cotton bug to come crawling out of it.

I kinda expect bugs to come crawling out of everything really.

I picked some little yellow flowers out of my neighbors yard once and some of the petals started crawling up my arm and the whole bush came alive with tiny yellow spiders that looked just like the flowers and I went totally spastic.

I want some goddamn happy hour fish and chips but the only way I can make it to happy hour anymore is if I show up to class drunk. and though it sounds somewhat more appealing than going to class sober, its still a really bad idea.


someone from my parents village was on my blog tonight. theres only like 12 of you fuckin townies and I'm prepared to kill you all if I get any grief over this fucking blog so think twice before you go nosing around in my business fuckers.
you too mom.

Blogger Shane thinks I am a total genius.

heh heh, wish i coulda seen the spiders scence.

thanks for the chuckle

Monday, October 17, 2005 7:07:00 AM  
Blogger dan thinks I am a total genius.

Me and a buddy used to go out for happy hour between afternoon class and evening class back in grad school. There was one night we split 3 pitchers between us in that 2 hour stretch.

Class that night was a blast!

Monday, October 17, 2005 7:17:00 AM  
Blogger The Prynce thinks I am a total genius.

I fully understand that it's going to be vastly different in Washington than in South Carolina, but I'm not sure I can grasp how different.

I mean, you've never seen a cotton 'bush' and you don't know what a morning glory is.
I dunno that I'd call the things that cotton grows on bushes, but they're certainly not trees. They're more like mini-bushes. The cold and farmers destroy the plants here after they put out (hehe, no better way to put that) but maybe they would make a cool bush after a few years.

With that being said, I'm gonna plant one in my yard next spring (or whenever they plant it). Bet my dogs would pee on it. And that would be too great 'cause you know the cotton would absorb it.

I get attacked by unknown insects all the time when I fuck with plants, though. I habitually cut, dry, and smoke leaves and pods and shit that I find in the woods and shit (there's like 50 billion God damned plant species surrounding my house so I have lots of things to test).
Given, that's probably not too smart in and of itself, but someone had to be the first to smoke marijuana.
But anyway, when I open the bag after I dry it a bit, I often find little bugs and shit have all but started a new life in my paper bags. Fuckin' buildin' webs and shit.

And speaking of spiders, I broke my new MP3 player the night I got it because I was going to bed and a huge spider came down from some hidden web and landed on my pillow. I turned around to find something to kill it with and when I turned back, it was gone. So I jerked my bed and moved it like half way across my room and then blanketed my room with bug spray.

Drinking before class may not be a horrible idea. There was a time during my senior year that I would take AT LEAST one shot of brandy before going to school. The rest of the time, I'd just take a lot of Benadryl and welcome any hallucinations. The sleepiness didn't bother me much though 'cause I was normally sleepy anyways.

k, I'm done. Sorry to waste space. =)

-=The Prynce

Monday, October 17, 2005 3:37:00 PM  
Blogger Rich Rosenthal II thinks I am a total genius.

No cotton in Illinois, got more soy than I've ever wanted to see all in one place and a bit of corn and wheat.

Monday, October 17, 2005 4:20:00 PM  
Blogger Mister Hand thinks I am a total genius.

Oh my GOD that last paragraph had me HOWLING.

"You too, mom!"


Why is that funny? I dunno. I'm twisted.

Monday, October 17, 2005 6:04:00 PM  
Anonymous JJ thinks I am a total genius.

My Mom reads my site on occassion. She rarely comments, but I see my parents' small town come up in the stats.

She doesn't seem to mind the questionable content so much. I tell her most of it is fiction. Heheheh...

Monday, October 17, 2005 8:08:00 PM  
Blogger Danielle thinks I am a total genius.

AHHHH!!! OMG CARRIE! Townies were at your blog? :-SS NOOOOOOOOO!!!! :(( And there's only about 12 of them fuckers? Scerry!!! I wouldn't want to go trick or treating there.... do they eat people?

Awww.. you got your camera working! Thanks for posting the cotton :">...and you've never seen a morning glory? I would send some of those, but they'd die on the way up there. I'm glad the cotton got up there. I'm nervous about sending things through the mail. I wish I could materialize things through email. OMG! Do you realize how much SHIT I would have in my house? :(( Ok, not a good idea... well, I got to get back to reading this CRAP for American Lit. Well, I LOVE American Lit, I just hate getting started, so I use the word "CRAP" no matter what it is. You know what I mean.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005 7:14:00 AM  
Blogger athooks thinks I am a total genius.

I had a class in college with only 8 other people. We all went out and got drunk after class. After the third week the teacher came with us. The fourth week we skipped going to the classroom and just held it in the bar. It was a short ficton class. Then people would get drunk and rip apart other people's work. Then this one dude totally called this girl on being a closet lesbian, and she broke down in tears of relief that she was outing herself. I was drunk, but I still had to ask if she'd make out with the bartender. Then everybody at the table called me insentive, but I just wanted to see two chicks make out. She really wasnt that hot, though. Sigh.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005 10:38:00 AM  
Blogger carrie thinks I am a total genius.

shane- yeah my dad thought it was hilarious. he tells me theres spiders on me sometimes just to watch me scream and flail around.

dan- my class is 3 hours of stiff, dry lecturing. if I got trashed before class I may as well not go cos I'd just fall asleep.

prynce- the farthest east I've ever been was like nebraska, so I have no idea what its like in SC.
like 3 hours east of seattle is flat and dry and agricultural but its all wheat and alfalfa.
well I wasn't really expecting you to be talking about getting high off of flowers! thats the vast difference between SC and washington. WE SMOKE DRUGS! :p
...but we could always use new ones, so if you find something good don't be shy ;)
I fucking hate bugs. especially spiders. I decided I wanted big potted plants all over my room a few years ago and I woke up one morning and all the plants had cobwebs on them and then I noticed a bunch of little red specks (spider mites) crawling around on all my shit and I totally flipped, threw garbage bags over all the plants and ran them outside and left them in our alley and then I shut the door to my room and didn't go back in for 3 weeks.
heh. like I said to dan, you don't wanna get fucked up before this class. I get stoned sometimes before I go in and I regret it after about 40 mins cos I'm ready to pass the fuck out and go home. its seriously dull as fuck.

rich- soy is good eats rich ;)

mister hand- thank you :) and shes managed to keep her mouth shut thus far.

jj- hahaha..well, I'd never be able to convince them it was fiction; they know about most of the shit I post.
as far as I know, no one who knows me really reads this with maybe the exception of a couple friends but they've never commented and I don't get many hits from my city.
I don't think my mom would care about this blog honestly. shes just as fucked as I am :)
but she has a HUGE mouth so she'd tell the whole family about it and then they'd read all the shit I say about them and prolly shit frisbees. and my birthday is just 2 weeks away if you catch my drift.. ;)

danielle- YES. TOWNIES. :-SS
they don't eat people, they just drink and cook up massive drama.
and theres wife swapping too, but thats included in cooking up massive drama.
heh. no, I can usually get it to take 1 or 2 pics before it dies again tho so thats what I did. I just can't find the battery charger :p

aaron- whoa. I wish I went to that school. theres 50 people in just about all of my classes.
well, it was a lofty claim. if shes gonna be gay, she should prove it.
I actually am completely insensitive and I don't want to see chicks make out at all. even hot ones, which lesbians rarely are.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005 2:03:00 AM  
Blogger captain_howdy_girl thinks I am a total genius.

that cotton looks like something from the blair witch project...

I know that feeling when some fuckface is spying on you through your blog... it's shitastic

Friday, October 28, 2005 1:17:00 AM  

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